Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
