I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
