did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
