at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize