You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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