My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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