Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
