we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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