he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
