I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
This baby is an asshole
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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