youre lurking in front of me
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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