I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
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He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
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The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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