just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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