just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
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