girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
