Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Randomize
