I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
