champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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