You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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