I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
