i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
