he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
you had me at cake vodka
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
