wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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