Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
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