You just made me feel so damn special
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
