My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
