I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
