Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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