Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
