Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
