Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
