I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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