Walk of Shame today included voting.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Randomize
