I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
