Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
