please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Randomize
