Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize