My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
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Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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