there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Randomize