And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
