I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Randomize