CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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