alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
