OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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