You work out of a Hotel?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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