oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize