He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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