with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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