Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
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