Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
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