I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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