wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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